When in conversation, I will often find myself lost in thought.
Instead of listening, I’m thinking about what I will say next, about something else happening in my life, about the tea I made this morning but forgot to drink…AGAIN.
Conversations feel a lot like meditation in this way.
What if we looked at conversation as a form of meditation? Let’s call it “conversational meditation”.
In meditation, we practice staying present with our breath, our body, or a mantra. When a thought comes up, we’re instructed to gently notice it and, without judgment, bring our attention back to our breath.
We can do the same in conversation. We can practice staying present with another person, with their energy, with their eye contact, and with their words.
When we find our thoughts drifting we can gently notice it and, without judgment, bring our attention back to the person speaking.
Boring conversations will become something to celebrate. What great practice!
Drifted too far and lost the thread of conversation? Simply tell your meditation partner, “I’m sorry, my mind drifted, but I am paying attention now.”
The intention isn’t to avoid drifting entirely. Even the most experienced meditators still have thoughts. The intention is to build the muscle of awareness and nonjudgement so that you can have more meaningful conversations.
Conversations are the atomic unit of relationships. They’re worth the practice.
Your turn: Today, try approaching each conversation as a form of meditation. If you feel inspired, please come back and share in the comments or reply to this email to let me know how it goes.
This is a short post, or what I’m calling a “Seed”. Seeds are simple ideas and reflections that may grow into essays, models, and books. I’ll be publishing seeds fairly frequently, as often as they sprout.
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This is a skill that so many have lost. But when the person you are communicating with realizes you are truly listening, the immediate bond is felt. It is amazing the emotional benefit that is shared between the two people. Your life can be enlightened and blessed when you are able to “meditate” on another human.
I’m enjoying your “seeds.” Thank you.
There are times when I find myself in a conversation that feels like a meditation really, generally with a friend who is on the same intellectual wavelength. We get to engage on ideas and feel excited by it to the extent that you leave that conversation feeling a lot lighter and brighter, as if you were in meditation throughout.. Thought exchange, and ideas simmering for hours through the conversations you leave with nothing but appreciation..