Hi, I’m David. Friends call me Spinks.
I’m a coach and writer helping people to stop blindly chasing success and to discover enoughness within.
My newsletter is both a documentary of my journey and sharing of the lessons, tools, and truths I’ve learned. I hope they will help you too.
I’ll start by sharing my story with you…
I’ve spent most of my life focused on achievement. First, as a kid chasing good grades, sports trophies, and social status. Then, as an adult hustling to win in the game of business.
After several failed startups, I finally found some success. I co-founded a community business called CMX which connects over 20,000 community professionals through conferences, trainings, and online spaces. That business was eventually acquired and I learned first-hand about the challenges of merging an independent community with a venture-backed business. I wrote a book called The Business of Belonging about everything we learned over that time about building community for business.
On the surface it was a wonderful ride. We helped thousands of people build communities and I was regarded as one of the top leaders in the industry. Behind the scenes, I struggled with constant anxiety, low self-esteem, and bouts of depression. I worked from a place of fear and it was hurting me and those around me. Still, I believed at the top of success mountain I’d find enoughness, so I kept pushing through the pain.
It was three years after the acquisition, and I found myself feeling burned out and creatively uninspired. My work lacked heart and soul. I sensed something needed to change so I stepped down and began what I thought would be a standard sabbatical (whatever that means). It quickly turned into my “dark night of the soul” after an intense public conflict, the unexpected loss of my mother-in-law, and a near-death experience of our baby daughter. It was the most difficult year of my life. I found myself lost in the abyss.
It was during this time that I discovered a deeply seeded belief that I am not enough. My work building businesses and communities, and establishing myself as a leader of industry were all attempts at finding enoughness and belonging from success and the approval of others. As long as I believed that I was “not enough”, I would forever seek others’ approval to fill that hole. I would people please, chase success, and sacrifice my health in order to feel like I am enough.
It was with the help of coaching, therapy, IFS, meditation, nature, breathwork, friends, family, and community that I started to uncover my shadows, and discovered enoughness within. My life started to change. I learned how to trust my heart and stop looking to others to make decision for me. I learned how to listen to my body and it’s deep wisdom. I stopped constantly seeking the approval of others. I became more calm, present, confident, spiritual, loving, and energized. I’m not fully healed and don’t expect I’ll ever be. But I’ve changed in ways I never thought possible. Life and work feel so much more alive and aligned.
I am now dedicated to supporting others in navigating life’s biggest transitions. I help them uncover all that impedes them from finding enoughness within and living a more aligned, balanced, and joyful life. You can learn more about my coaching practice under Downshift here.
When I’m not working, I’m usually in the woods, meditating, reading, or being silly with my wife, parents, and two (soon to be three) kids.
