I enjoyed reading this, David. Thank you for being so honest.
I used to be a workaholic because I thought that the only way to be successful was through work. Now I attribute my success to a set of feelings. I regularly ask myself, “How do I want my life to feel?” If I feel comfortable, free, helpful and impactful, I’m all good no matter what I'm doing.
Oof that was a difficult read in many ways. You cut to the chase and I appreciate you doing so. Well done for going on this journey yourself. I feel societal norms are so stacked in favour of the “got to prove yourself”/ you’re not good enough yet… that having the courage to just not listen to that or decide to plough your own path is incredibly brave and, in many ways, difficult. Thanks for sharing and keep showing us how to do things better! Perhaps more of us will find the courage as a result. 🙏
I was a teacher for a long time and while there was a lot that I loved about the job it ate up my life! I constantly broke my own boundaries (e.g., I would tell myself not to read let alone respond to emails over the weekend... only to believe that it would make my Monday easier if I went through my inbox on Sunday evening, but inevitably felt more stressed).
Currently, I am on a career break from the classroom and exploring some different avenues. I really like that you have days to focus on different projects - I may try this!
My wife, mom, sister and mother in law are all teachers. I know how hard it can be to hold boundaries. Wishing you well in your abyss and your exploration of whatever comes next!
I think I've always resisted calling my relationship to work being a workaholic. I generally stay within the time confines of my day, I don't feel like I'm overly 'busy'. But I've realized that my version is less in how hard I work as in how I have defined my worth by work - by the successes, by my title, by the way that it comes first. The workaholic part is the part that I've defined it that way at any cost. At the cost of now being on a leave of absence for burn out and all its many tendrils. At the cost of knowing what I even want.
I enjoyed reading this, David. Thank you for being so honest.
I used to be a workaholic because I thought that the only way to be successful was through work. Now I attribute my success to a set of feelings. I regularly ask myself, “How do I want my life to feel?” If I feel comfortable, free, helpful and impactful, I’m all good no matter what I'm doing.
Such a better measure of success.
Oof that was a difficult read in many ways. You cut to the chase and I appreciate you doing so. Well done for going on this journey yourself. I feel societal norms are so stacked in favour of the “got to prove yourself”/ you’re not good enough yet… that having the courage to just not listen to that or decide to plough your own path is incredibly brave and, in many ways, difficult. Thanks for sharing and keep showing us how to do things better! Perhaps more of us will find the courage as a result. 🙏
Appreciate you reading and for all the support and kind words you've been sending my way Madeleine. It's seen and appreciated.
Thank you for sharing this, David.
I was a teacher for a long time and while there was a lot that I loved about the job it ate up my life! I constantly broke my own boundaries (e.g., I would tell myself not to read let alone respond to emails over the weekend... only to believe that it would make my Monday easier if I went through my inbox on Sunday evening, but inevitably felt more stressed).
Currently, I am on a career break from the classroom and exploring some different avenues. I really like that you have days to focus on different projects - I may try this!
My wife, mom, sister and mother in law are all teachers. I know how hard it can be to hold boundaries. Wishing you well in your abyss and your exploration of whatever comes next!
I think I've always resisted calling my relationship to work being a workaholic. I generally stay within the time confines of my day, I don't feel like I'm overly 'busy'. But I've realized that my version is less in how hard I work as in how I have defined my worth by work - by the successes, by my title, by the way that it comes first. The workaholic part is the part that I've defined it that way at any cost. At the cost of now being on a leave of absence for burn out and all its many tendrils. At the cost of knowing what I even want.
This resonates very hard with my experience.
To me, workaholism isn’t the same as hard work.
It’s about the motivation behind the work.
This is it… Simple but not easy.
A lovely honest share David and it all so so resonates. Thanks for your courage in sharing how this has been for you.
Thanks Todd, sounds like we've been on similar journeys!