Legacy is a kind of illusion, as are any of the ways we project ourselves into the past or future. We make our marks in small ways, in the present, in the way we move in the world and connect with others. (Of course this aligns with what you're saying, and what Buddhism as well as other Eastern religions and New Age theorists have said. There's nothing truly new under the sun, eh?)
Holding the door for a parent with a stroller. Smiling at your barista. Taking a moment to comment on each other's Substack posts. Or, as you suggest, simply breathing a peaceful breath in a chaotic world. These are our legacies, larger than we imagine.
1. In college, I was obsessed with philosophy and only ingesting and focusing on ideas that were "timeless". I only wanted that stuff that was capital T true and lasted. It was the only thing "worth" spending my time on. For me less than legacy than a desire to be "superior".
2. Early in my career I realized I had daydreams of being so successful so that everyone would look up to and admire and love me. Which is wild in retrospect, because many of the most successful people are wildly disliked.
Both still creep in these days, but I find myself mostly focused on living a good life :)
I think you're reusing the word to suit an idea, but it doesn't sit with me. At. All. And I work really hard every day on my legacy project, because it will make a difference to millions of people, if I can just get it out there into the Aged Care Industry, which is really hard to penetrate. And I don't do this for praise or applause at all. I just want to know that when I go, I have made a difference. That's a legacy. That's what counts.
I've come to see legacy as a warped attempt at longevity. It's our survival instinct on overload.
We try to extend our first death (biological) by living longer. Then we try to extend our second death (symbolic) by leaving our mark on the world after we're gone.
In both cases, what would most of us choose? "Survive longer."
So is our avoidance of death, in both forms, a necessary rebellion against our fate? Or a form of self-deception against the inevitable?
P.S. I'm so fascinated with this topic that my debut novel grapples with these questions (coming soon); basically, an existential crisis disguised as a survival story
I disagree - for me, it's not an attempt to prolong anything. I just want to know that when I go? I've done stuff in my life that was worthwhile. That's it. The satisfaction of knowing I made a difference. And a legacy can be a bad, destructive thing as well. Depends on who's doing the leaving!
haaa Rick - I know exactly where... I put both my parents in nursing homes where they were stuck in beds, in rooms, on valium, and left to die. It was awful. My dad was amazing, spoke 6 languages, first policeman in Queensland to have a degree, head of ASIO etc. etc. and died with all his stories. It's heartbreaking for me, and I don't want anyone else to go through that. We need better preventive systems in aged care as well, and I'm working like crazy on that. I don't need approbation or applause. Just knowing I did something worthwhile is for me, enough.
Have you heard of Jordan Grumet, author of The Purpose Code? Your story made me think of him. He’s a hospice doctor, who lost his dad at an early age (also was a doc), and that forged him (good and bad), and he’s come to a better understanding of his purpose (and explains it simply for others to notice theirs vs notice when they deceive themselves).
Anyways, thanks again for the discussion and insight.
No I haven't but thank you! I'm finding it right now, and will read with delight. And it might help with getting in those bloody aged care business doors!
To paraphrase John Lennon (I wonder what his legacy is), legacy is what happens when we're focusing on other things.
And to paraphrase "Mean Girls" (now that's legacy), stop trying to make legacy happen.
hadn't heard that lennon phrase and i love it. very fetch.
Legacy is a kind of illusion, as are any of the ways we project ourselves into the past or future. We make our marks in small ways, in the present, in the way we move in the world and connect with others. (Of course this aligns with what you're saying, and what Buddhism as well as other Eastern religions and New Age theorists have said. There's nothing truly new under the sun, eh?)
Holding the door for a parent with a stroller. Smiling at your barista. Taking a moment to comment on each other's Substack posts. Or, as you suggest, simply breathing a peaceful breath in a chaotic world. These are our legacies, larger than we imagine.
thanks scott, beautifully reflected (=
I had two versions of this:
1. In college, I was obsessed with philosophy and only ingesting and focusing on ideas that were "timeless". I only wanted that stuff that was capital T true and lasted. It was the only thing "worth" spending my time on. For me less than legacy than a desire to be "superior".
2. Early in my career I realized I had daydreams of being so successful so that everyone would look up to and admire and love me. Which is wild in retrospect, because many of the most successful people are wildly disliked.
Both still creep in these days, but I find myself mostly focused on living a good life :)
i went through both of those too!
I think you're reusing the word to suit an idea, but it doesn't sit with me. At. All. And I work really hard every day on my legacy project, because it will make a difference to millions of people, if I can just get it out there into the Aged Care Industry, which is really hard to penetrate. And I don't do this for praise or applause at all. I just want to know that when I go, I have made a difference. That's a legacy. That's what counts.
I've come to see legacy as a warped attempt at longevity. It's our survival instinct on overload.
We try to extend our first death (biological) by living longer. Then we try to extend our second death (symbolic) by leaving our mark on the world after we're gone.
In both cases, what would most of us choose? "Survive longer."
So is our avoidance of death, in both forms, a necessary rebellion against our fate? Or a form of self-deception against the inevitable?
P.S. I'm so fascinated with this topic that my debut novel grapples with these questions (coming soon); basically, an existential crisis disguised as a survival story
I disagree - for me, it's not an attempt to prolong anything. I just want to know that when I go? I've done stuff in my life that was worthwhile. That's it. The satisfaction of knowing I made a difference. And a legacy can be a bad, destructive thing as well. Depends on who's doing the leaving!
Thanks for disagreeing! Follow-up question… where do you think the desire to have made a difference “comes from”? Like why do you think you want that?
haaa Rick - I know exactly where... I put both my parents in nursing homes where they were stuck in beds, in rooms, on valium, and left to die. It was awful. My dad was amazing, spoke 6 languages, first policeman in Queensland to have a degree, head of ASIO etc. etc. and died with all his stories. It's heartbreaking for me, and I don't want anyone else to go through that. We need better preventive systems in aged care as well, and I'm working like crazy on that. I don't need approbation or applause. Just knowing I did something worthwhile is for me, enough.
Thanks for sharing and what a noble mission 🫡
Have you heard of Jordan Grumet, author of The Purpose Code? Your story made me think of him. He’s a hospice doctor, who lost his dad at an early age (also was a doc), and that forged him (good and bad), and he’s come to a better understanding of his purpose (and explains it simply for others to notice theirs vs notice when they deceive themselves).
Anyways, thanks again for the discussion and insight.
No I haven't but thank you! I'm finding it right now, and will read with delight. And it might help with getting in those bloody aged care business doors!